The Vicious Cycle of Ghosting: A Real-Life Case Study
In the high-stakes world of recruitment, ghosting is not just a trendy term - it’s a painful reality that breeds frustration, mistrust, and missed opportunities. Here’s a story that illustrates the many layers of the problem and shows why accountability matters more than ever.
The Players:
Alex (Candidate): An enthusiastic professional ready to make the next career move.
Mirna (External Recruiter): An HR specialist eager to fill a critical position.
Ted (Business Director): The hiring leader who needs top talent - fast.
After six long months of searching for the right candidate, Ted insisted the position was a top priority. Mirna, an external recruiter fueled by a desire to impress and succeed, jumped at the task:
Preparation
Mirna crafted a detailed job description reflecting Ted’s needs.
Together, they confirmed the responsibilities, qualifications, and salary.
Ted approved the job ad and stressed the urgency of the search.
Candidate Search
Mirna discovered Alex, whose skills were a perfect match.
She guided Alex in polishing his CV and coached him for the upcoming interview.
Mirna scheduled the meeting with Ted and provided him with a thorough report on Alex.
The Waiting Game
Two weeks passed with no response from Ted. Mirna sent follow-up emails and text messages, but all she got was silence.
Another two weeks went by before Ted finally responded, “I’ve been busy, but let’s keep Alex on standby.”
A full two months after the interview, Ted admitted he had hired another candidate from a different agency.
Where It All Went Wrong
Ghosting by the Hiring Leader
Test postponed feedback and avoided direct communication, leaving Mirna and Alex in the dark.
The lack of transparency sent a clear message of low priority - despite his initial urgency.
Ghosting by the Candidate (Potential Future Scenario)
Alex, having been left hanging for months, understandably lost trust in the process.
Next time Alex encounters a recruiter, can we blame him for being cynical or even ghosting them back?
Ghosting by the System
Mirna, despite her diligence, had no real authority to challenge Ted’s behavior.
The organization’s culture offered no checks or balances to ensure candidates received timely feedback.
Ghosting by the Client
Mirna was ghosted by her client - Ted - and was left in professional limbo.
She had no clarity on if she should continue sourcing new candidates or to halt the search.
She was also put in a very uncomfortable position related to communication with her candidate. On one hand, she didn’t want to ruin her client’s reputation; on the other hand, she was putting the relationship with her candidate in jeopardy.
The Consequences
For Ted (the Business Director)
Damaged reputation among recruiters and potential future hires.
Lost credibility with HR partners who felt their time was wasted.
Every candidate is also a potential client, so such behavior can back-fire one day.
For Alex (the Candidate)
Squandered time and emotional energy without closure.
Negative perception of the company, which he may share in reviews, forums, and/or directly with other people.
Lack of trust in future recruitment processes.
For Mirna (the Recruiter)
Frustration and sinking morale.
Risk of disengaging from future recruitment projects due to lack of support.
Poor perception of client & supplier relations.
What is Ghosting?
Ghosting is “the practice of suddenly ending all contact with someone without explanation, especially in a romantic relationship, but increasingly seen in professional settings as well.” (Source: Cambridge Dictionary)
In recruitment, ghosting can manifest as companies failing to provide feedback after an interview and/or candidates disappearing during the recruitment process.
Ghosting also extends to business relationships, where one party, often due to miscommunication or a lack of accountability, stops responding without explanation.
Why Does Ghosting Happen?
Lack of Clarity on Values and Goals
Employers and candidates often approach recruitment without a clear understanding of what they seek. Companies may not fully define the ideal candidate profile, while candidates may lack clarity about their personal career goals or values. Without alignment, disengagement becomes more likely.
Transactional Mindsets
Many workplaces still operate on a “I pay, you perform” model, which ignores the emotional and relational aspects of work. This transactional model discourages open communication and fosters disengagement. Similarly, in business, ghosting often arises from relationships treated purely as transactions - lacking mutual respect or transparency.
Artificial Recruitment Projects
Some recruitment processes exist only to fulfill internal metrics or to test market interest, which leads to candidates being strung along without a real role being available. This lack of authenticity breeds distrust and disengagement.
Fear and Lack of Empowerment
Recruiters or hiring managers may ghost due to fear of delivering negative feedback or admitting a lack of decision-making power. In many cases, representatives of a company are not empowered to make key decisions and avoid communicating to escape accountability.
Lack of Process Transparency
Candidates value transparency in recruitment, but are often left in the dark due to disorganized processes, or because of a reluctance to provide clear feedback. Even if the decision is a rejection, any form of communication is better than silence.
Ghosting in Business Relationships
Ghosting is not limited to recruitment; it is increasingly prevalent in B2B relationships as in the business case described above. Companies ghost potential clients, vendors, and/or partners, due to:
Misaligned expectations of services or deliverables.
Representatives without decision-making authority failing to escalate issues.
Fear of admitting that the company cannot deliver as previously promised it would.
This behavior erodes trust and damages long-term relationships. In both recruitment and business, ghosting stems from the same root causes: a lack of ownership, clarity, and value-driven practices.
The Larger Impact
Ghosting takes a serious toll on professional relationships. Candidates and business partners invest time, energy, and hope only to be met with dead silence. Employers risk tarnishing their brand when they fail to offer courtesy updates. Over time, this cycle of poor communication erodes trust and sets a precedent for future interactions - be it in recruitment, client services, or within team dynamics.
How to Break the Cycle by Applying a New Approach: Putting Values First
Focus on Values
Companies must shift their perspective to prioritize candidates as customers. By aligning recruitment and business processes with organizational values and ensuring these values are clearly communicated, they can foster a better candidate and customer experience.
Empower Employees
In both recruitment and broader business interactions, empower team members to own decisions, communicate openly, and address challenges head-on.
Commit to Feedback
Providing clear, honest feedback - whether good or bad - is essential. Silence damages relationships far more than constructive criticism ever could.
Encourage Transparency
From the start of any process, ensure all parties understand timelines, expectations, and next steps. Honesty, even about delays or uncertainties, builds trust.
By taking these small, intentional steps, we can turn ghosting into the rare exception rather than the discouraging rule it has become. Let’s strive for an environment where every candidate, recruiter, supplier, business partner, and hiring manager experiences the respect and transparency they deserve.
The Professional Standard We Deserve
Ghosting doesn’t have to remain an ugly fixture. Ghosting thrived in silence - breaking it starts with a commitment to clarity and integrity.