Steven’s Networking Dilemma: A Case for Value-Based Networking
Steven is an exceptional manager. He has a natural talent for connecting and resonating with others and an uncanny ability to “connect the dots” by introducing people from different companies, industries, or even backgrounds who could benefit from collaborating or supporting one other. He understands the importance of building and maintaining professional relationships, and he thrives in environments where networking is critical to creating long-term value.
Steven regularly attends conferences, industry events, and various local networking meetups. Armed with a sharp sense of humor and excellent interpersonal skills, he’s a master at initiating “cold connections.” By the end of every event, his pockets are filled with business cards and new LinkedIn connections, and his network has expanded with several dozen new contacts in recent months. As someone responsible for business development, networking isn’t just a skill for Steven - it’s a critical part of his professional value within his company and industry
For years, Steven has built his reputation by facilitating introductions and offering valuable recommendations to those around him. He knows that good referrals lead to more good referrals, creating a cycle of opportunity and mutual long-term benefit. He’s become so effective at networking that there’s practically no company, industry, or professional organization where he doesn’t know someone or can’t find a way to get connected to the right person or people.
But here’s where Steven’s story takes a turn.
The Hidden Flaw in Steven’s Networking Approach
Despite his vast and growing network, Steven finds himself facing a critical issue: most of his connections don’t truly align with his values or long-term goals. The speed and surface-level nature of his interactions have left him with a network that’s broad, but shallow. Many of the people in his contact list attend events for reasons other than building meaningful relationships. They may be there to enjoy the coffee, reconnect with the same familiar faces, or simply pass the time and get away from the office.
Even worse, many of these contacts lack influence within their organizations or aren’t even interested in leveraging their networks for collaborative opportunities. When Steven needed support for himself, whether it be a project lead, a new business partner, or even just advice, he realized he didn’t have anyone he could genuinely rely on. His network, while large in number, wasn’t delivering the value he previously expected or hoped.
Case 1
After Steven delivered a successful project for one of his connections, they praised his work and hinted at a job offer. In the meantime, they asked him for another pro-bono project as a “favor”. Steven, eager to secure the subsequent opportunity as well as strengthen the relationship, agreed to take on the second project.
Believing that this would lead to a full-time role, Steven poured more energy into the second project. But as months went by, his hopes turned into frustration. Four months passed without a formal job offer. Steven ended up waiting over 7 months with no sign of payment for his work even though he had accepted the offer a second time - this this time with a list of doubts - as a good faith gesture given the potentially bright future described to him.
Steven found himself stuck in a cycle of waiting, with no clear communication or resolution from the potential future employer. His goodwill and belief in the relationship were exploited, leaving him undervalued, unpaid, doubting himself and his values with his decision being in a constant “waiting room” mode.
Value-Based Boundaries
This experience highlights a truth about networking: while relationships are key, they must be grounded in mutual respect and clear boundaries. Before agreeing to the second project, Steven should have asked for written terms, including the scope of work, a payment structure, and project timeline. Even for networking purposes, it’s essential to set clear limits and ensure that contributions are recognized in earnest. Networking is not just about saying “yes” to every opportunity - it’s about knowing when to say “no.” Aligning with your values means respecting your own worth and ensuring that relationships are built on trust, not exploitation. In Steven’s case, if he had approached the situation through the lens of value-based networking, he would have prioritized transparency and reciprocity, avoiding months of frustration and loss.
Case 2
One day, Steven was approached by a contact in his network who needed an introduction to a specific company. The person was eager, explaining that they had been trying to get in touch with the company for months, but had no success. Steven leveraged his credibility and connections with the company of interest to facilitate an introduction. He found a way to get in with a particular contact in the company, he made an introduction, and prepared both sides for potential future opportunities.
Afterward, Steven asked the contact from his network if there would be a chance that the successful outcome(s) of such an introduction could also create value for him. Whether through recognition, a referral fee, or a future opportunity, he wanted to understand how his efforts might be reciprocated.
But instead of receiving a clear response, Steven was ghosted. The person he had helped disappeared without acknowledgment and even worse, Steven was left in an awkward position with the company he had introduced to his contact. Without follow-up or alignment, the collaboration faltered, and Steven’s reputation with the company suffered.
Steven didn’t check whether the person seeking his help shared the same values, priorities, or professional integrity as he did. He didn’t confirm whether this person had the authority or credibility to follow through on their end of the collaboration, which is a very common mistake we often make. Furthermore, while networking is about building relationships we should also be honest about expressing and agreeing on our expectations upfront, making sure to discuss and agree how such collaboration may support both sides’ efforts or create mutual value.
Value-based networking ensures that you have a chance to engage with people who align with your values and goals, that your contributions are recognized and respected in a way that resonates with you, and that you protect your time, effort, and reputation.
The Missed Opportunity: Value-Based Networking
Steven’s challenge wasn’t his ability to network, it was the quality and alignment of his connections. Had he approached networking through the lens of shared values, his results could have been dramatically different. By focusing on individuals whose professional goals and personal values resonated with his own, Steven could have built a deeper and more meaningful, albeit smaller network.
With a value-based networking approach:
Steven’s connections would have been more authentic and mutually beneficial.
The effort required to maintain relationships would have felt more natural and rewarding.
His network would have been a reliable resource, offering support, collaboration, and real opportunities when needed.
Value-based Networking
Steven’s story highlights the difference between networking for numbers and networking for value alignment. A large contact list may feel impressive, but without shared values, those connections often fail to deliver meaningful outcomes.
Had Steven embraced value-based networking, he would have built a network not only of people he knows, but of people he can trust and rely on. By identifying and prioritizing shared values, networking becomes less about quantity and more about quality, while creating lasting relationships that truly matter.
Practical Tips & Steps Ahead
While Steven’s experience offers a valuable lesson, the good news is that anyone can adopt a value-based networking approach. It’s never too late to reassess and refine your professional relationships. In our next two Knowledge Corner posts, we’ll outline new tips as well as the practical steps you can take to implement value-based networking in your career. With this approach, you can create a network that aligns with your values, enhances your professional life, and delivers long-term satisfaction and success.